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Chapter 30

Elizabeth stood just outside her door, the silence and pressure mounting as she, Jason and Francis all watched each other uncomfortably. Francis faded into the background somewhat since she saw him everyday. It was the sudden appearance of Jason that had Elizabeth frozen in her spot. Seeing him awake caught her unprepared. But seeing him up and walking definitely surprised her.

She was tempted to bolt, either down the stairs or back into her room. Usually she could babble freely around Jason, but she couldn't seem to find any words today. Francis, mercifully, stepped in and broke the silence.

"Morning, Elizabeth."

"Good morning, Francis," she smiled a bit uneasy. Then her eyes darted to Jason. "And-and morning to you."

"Hi, Elizabeth," he spoke for the first time. "How are you?"

"Pretty good. What about you?" she asked, twisting her fingers into the bottom hem of her shirt. "You...you're out of bed."

"I feel good," he answered. "Glad to be out of bed."

She could only imagine how trapped he felt, and she started to smile at his comment, remembering how he hated sitting on her couch with nothing to do after he was shot. But then she remembered that she was the reason he'd spent the last week and more in bed and her smile slipped.

He frowned as her faced hardened. "Doc's just being cautious. My headache was gone a couple of days ago."

"Yeah," Francis chimed in. "If Doc Robles had his way, Jason would be in bed for at least another week. I think he finally just got tired of this guy's constant grumping."

The smile slowly crept back onto her face. She knew they were trying to put her at ease, and it did help a little. "Yeah, I know how difficult a patient he can be."

Elizabeth knew by the look on Jason's face that he also remembered the winter he was shot. He hated sitting still, and always pushed himself beyond what he was probably ready for. But if his doctor had told him he could get out of bed, it was better than returning to her studio and finding out he'd gone for a walk and was then so stiff he couldn't remove his jacket.

Tucking a strand of hair behind her ear she cleared her throat. "So, where are you heading off to?"

"The library," he tipped his head to the side. "They let me out of bed so I can go sit in a chair."

"Complain, complain," Francis mocked as he rolled his eyes. "And just so Doc doesn't get on my case, we should probably get in there so he doesn't see you're starting to sweat."

Her gaze swung over to Jason and she noticed he did look a little clammy. She was such an idiot. And so was he for standing there getting tired.

"Were you going to go get some breakfast?" Francis asked, "or do you want to come join us? I could head down and get you something."

She wanted to glare at him, but didn't. She knew he was trying to keep her talking to Jason, and she didn't know how she could say no without cruelly shutting them both down. "Yeah, I guess I could come...for a little bit," she answered.

Francis smiled and nudged Jason slightly to get him to move. She walked a little bit behind them and quietly sat down on one of the couches as she watched Jason sit down across from her. She noticed that it wasn't as painful and stiff as when he was shot, it was just slightly awkward due to the bulky cast.

"Alright?" Francis asked, and Jason nodded. The guard then turned to Elizabeth. "What about you, Elizabeth? Want me to get you something to eat?"

Before she could tell him she wasn't really hungry right now, he said he'd go get something for her and let Yvette know she was awake. She watched him leave the room and wanted to scowl at him for taking away her means of escape. Instead, she looked at Jason and nervously laughed. "He's not very subtle, is he?"

"I'm sorry," he said, his voice soft. "If you want to go, that's okay. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable."

She sighed at his resignation, his quiet acceptance that once he gave her an out she would run like a rabbit that spotted a hawk. And while there was a part of her that wanted to do bolt, she felt guilty for always running away from Jason. Nearly a week ago he told her he wouldn't let her push him away, and she was afraid of that, which was why she was avoiding him while he couldn't come after her.

"I think if I never wanted to be uncomfortable again, I'd lock myself in my room and never see anybody. But that just isn't possible," she told him. "Sometimes being uncomfortable means I'm getting better. If Doctor Torres never pushed, I never would have remembered what happened; it's just like a physical therapist has to push a patient to get better."

He nodded briefly as if to say he understood, but he didn't say anything. "It would be easy to avoid you, to run away every time I felt uncomfortable, but easy doesn't mean it's right. Or what I really want to do.

"I've missed you, Jason," she said shakily after a moment's pause. "Even after all the anger and harsh things we said, even when you were with Courtney and I was with Ric, I missed you. My biggest regret wasn't really that we never explored a romance between us...it was that we lost our friendship. I regretted that I lost the person who I could talk to about anything."

She sighed, feeling a little uneasy over saying so much while Jason remained silent, but she forced herself to forge on. "Sometimes it would be easy to stay in that pattern we fell into, to think that our friendship is gone so why bother? But I don't want to do that, Jason. I've thought about what we talked about in your room that night, and I want our friendship back."

Elizabeth wasn't going to say that in a perfect world she also wanted more; she was afraid to think about that let alone voice it. But she knew that because of their circumstances she could try talking to him and get their friendship back, or she could hide from him forever. "It may be a little difficult at first, but I don't want to walk away just because it might be hard. I'm trying not to do that anymore."

"I...I don't want that either," Jason finally said when she fell silent. "I've missed you too, and I realized just how much when all of this started and I felt like I'd been punched in the gut because I had no idea what was happening to you. Or if you'd even let me see you, let alone help you. When you did let me talk to you, when you didn't completely turn me away, I was grateful."

"Grateful?" she whispered so softly she didn't think he even heard. He was grateful she talked to him? It was a strange concept for her to grasp.

He kept talking, though, unaware of her thoughts. "When I brought you here, I told myself you getting better was the most important thing, not trying to get our friendship back. If you didn't want me around after you got better, I'd leave. I'll still do that, if that's what you want."

Her eyes suddenly burned when he said that. It reminded her of that day in the park when he offered to take her to Italy, anywhere as long as she was safe and away from Lucky. He told her he'd leave if she decided she didn't want to be with him anymore. The thought had only briefly scared her then, because as tempting as it sounded, she was too blinded by her loyalty to Lucky to really consider leaving with Jason. Now, the thought of Jason walking away terrified her. And her fear shook her, because it showed how deeply she was connecting to Jason again.

She knew that he would honor his word if she told him that's what she wanted. He would give up everything he wanted - because apparently he did want a friendship - just for her. But being honest with herself, she could admit she didn't want him to go. She knew it was going to be work for them both to feel comfortable as friends, but she didn't want the alternative.

"And even though I've said all that," he said with a slight self-deprecating smile, "I like that you're talking about friendship. I don't want to push you, but I really have missed you."

Her smile in return was small, but it definitely was genuine. "It's been a while since we've talked like this, huh?"

Jason gave a little laugh and nodded. "Yeah. I guess Francis wasn't so bad to push after all."

"Careful there. That could go to his head," she chuckled. "But yeah...I'm glad that we talked. Let's just remember this talk when we have our moments of setback."

Francis walked into the kitchen to see Yvette and Alejandro sitting at the table, talking in Spanish and laughing. The two doctors enjoyed their professional camaraderie, and sometimes just the talk of Puerto Rico and the islands. He gave them a brief nod and then pulled out some foot to fix a plate for Elizabeth.

"Fixing another plate for Jason?" Dr. Robles asked as he shifted in his chair. "Was he happy to get out of bed?"

Laughing, Francis nodded. "Oh yeah. He was thrilled. Wasn't too happy that he only got to go down the hall to the library, but he's enjoying being out."

"I'll probably stop up in a little bit to see him. I didn't stay long this morning, he getting a little anxious, and I want to check over a few things then call Roberto at the hospital and give him an update. I could take the plate up if you'd like."

"Nah," he shook his head. "This is actually for Elizabeth."

"She's up?" Yvette entered the conversation.

He nodded. "Came out as we were walking down the hall. They talked a little, then she actually went with us to the library."

"That your doing?" she asked with an arched brow.

"Maybe a little," he shrugged. "But you know Elizabeth would have bolted if she absolutely refused to be around him. But since she's gone in every night to see him while he sleeps, I figured she was just a little skittish and a small push could help."

"She's been in to see him?" Alejandro asked.

Yvette clearly was surprised. "I didn't know that. She never said anything."

"I was having trouble sleeping the first night and I heard her," he said, setting the plate down and leaning back against the counter. "She didn't stay long, but I was curious. So I waited up the next night, and she came back. Visited him every night 'cept for last night."

"She was exhausted," Yvette murmured.

"I know. She looked a lot better this morning."

"Good," her doctor nodded. "I'll let her have some time to herself, especially if she's actually talking with Jason again. That talk with him earlier really seemed to help."

He tried to look a bit sheepish as he confessed. "I was gonna move slow in the hopes they'd talk, but I've probably drawn this out as much as I can. So I'll see you later."

Then he picked up the plate and headed down the hall towards the stairs. As he reached the second floor he tried to quiet his footsteps to see if he could Jason and Elizabeth. He didn't hear any yelling, and Elizabeth's door was still partially open as she'd left it when she came out, so he figured that was a good sign.

Nearing the door he heard the pair softly talking, and he smiled. When he walked into the room he saw they were sitting on opposite ends of one of the window seats as Elizabeth pointed to something through the glass.

"He's usually in that tree there," she raised her hand. "Sometimes I'd see him run back and forth between the two trees."

"You mean the squirrel?" Francis asked, making his presence known.

She turned, tensing slightly. "Yeah. I've watched him a lot."

"Me too," he smiled. "He's crazy sometimes. Here, just a little bit."

"Thank you, Francis," she smiled briefly as she took the plate.

"You're welcome." Looking over at Jason, then back at her he said, "Both your doctors said they'd up in a bit. I'm gonna go do rounds and see how things are."

"Thanks, Francis," Jason told him with a brief smile Elizabeth didn't see.

He just nodded in return and said, "I'll check in with you later. Enjoy your breakfast, Elizabeth."

"Thanks, Francis," she said again. Her voice was a little stronger, calmer. Probably because he wouldn't be staying, which he knew would make her uncomfortable.

When he left and stood in the hallway, he paused for a moment, smiling when he heard Elizabeth's soft voice carry out to him as she once again talked with Jason.

Chapter 31

Francis looked over at Jason as they passed through the gate to the estate. They were on their way back from the hospital where Dr. Robles friend had checked him out. It was nearly a month after the accident and the cumbersome cast that went from shoulder to wrist had been replaced with a smaller, more manageable one. Jason was pleased with the improvement in his condition, but Francis knew the smile on his friend's face was due to the fact they were almost home.

It had been slow going, in fact sometimes Jason and Elizabeth ended up back at square one, but they were rebuilding their friendship. They were both still a little guarded, even though neither one would admit it. Jason wanted more than a friendship from Elizabeth, Francis had seen it the morning he walked into the bedroom in Mexico and saw the younger man watching over her with such intensity and concern he hadn't moved or eaten. Francis sometimes wondered as well if Elizabeth's feelings for Jason went beyond just friendship.

At times he found them watching the other person, and their looks were the same. A sadness, a longing, something that just felt deeper. He was invisible to them because he was their guard, and so he was free to observe. But he decided he wouldn't do anything to try and bring them together. They'd figure things out, or continue to torture themselves. He respected them, and his friendships with them, too much to try to force them into something before they were ready to face it.

Of course, if they were still like this in three months, he'd rethink his no interference policy. Definitely by six months. He doubted Jason would do anything, so his only hope was Elizabeth would continue to improve in her treatments and take the first step.

As they reached the house, Jason was practically fidgeting in his seat. Of course it was imperceptible to most people, but Francis could see Jason's shifts and changes in position that he knew had nothing to do with comfort. When the car stopped, Jason had the door open before Francis had the keys out of the ignition.

Jason at least waited for him before going into the house and Francis worked very hard to bite back a smile at his friend's obvious behavior. Once they were inside, Jason looked around casually, but the guard knew he was looking for Elizabeth. And as soon as he heard her footsteps on the stairs, Jason smiled.

"You're back," she smiled. Her eyes widened along with her smile. "And you have a new cast."

"Yeah," he nodded. "I'll be happy when this one's gone, but it's really nice that the bigger one is."

Elizabeth looked over and grinned a bit sheepishly as if she realized she'd completely ignored him and said, "Hey, Francis."

"Hi, Elizabeth," he nodded, then made haste to make himself scarce. "See you two later. Too much coffee at the hospital while I waited for Chuckles."

He walked down the hallway smiling as their laughter, and then their voices carried after him.

Yvette smiled to herself as she saw Elizabeth sneak glances at the clock on the shelf. Normally a patient checking the time was never a good sign, but this was a time she didn't mind. The young woman was looking at the time because she was anxious for Jason to get back.

It was remarkable at the chances that had happened in the two months since she arrived in Costa Rica and found herself hired by Jason Morgan to treat Elizabeth Webber. Elizabeth was withdrawn, a hollow shell of a woman frightened of her own shadow. As much as she tried to keep Jason out, she also depended on him. The first time Jason headed into the small village near the property, Elizabeth had wandered room to room, unable to sit down or stop twisting her fingers until the car reappeared and she heard his voice drift in from outside.

Elizabeth's anxiousness now wasn't because she feared Jason had abandoned her, but because she missed his company. The two had grown closer, more at ease with each other, though there were still some stutter steps. Elizabeth was growing comfortable with his presence, believing he was sincere in his words and actions. She no longer viewed everything as suspect, no longer searched for a hidden meaning, or even falsity, in Jason's behavior. And her happiness over the regained friendship was clear.

Yvette knew, though, that part of the missteps in the relationship was due to the fact Elizabeth was trying to keep from revealing she was in love with Jason. She believed that friendship was all she could ever have with him. He hadn't done all of this to have her fall all over him shamelessly and she refused to do anything that would make Jason uncomfortable and pull away from her. So she sometimes pulled away first, determined to always keep things light that she sometimes redirected conversations or activities.

It confused Jason, Yvette could see, but the man seemed to have endless amounts of patience when it came to Elizabeth. It was because, the doctor realized, he was in love with the young woman. Elizabeth didn't think she was deserving of love, let alone Jason's, so she had convinced herself all he would ever feel for her was friendship.

Despite Elizabeth making amazing progress with the attack in her studio, she still had some big self-esteem issues. So much of the time had been spent trying to help Elizabeth remember, and then cope with the memories once she did. They talked about Tom Baker and Elizabeth's rape, and all the way through to how she'd nearly slept with Ric and how she felt revolted by that. They talked about her guilt that she'd taken a human life, and then her guilt at the thoughts she had that Ric got exactly what he deserved.

There was still so much there to deal with, that sometimes Yvette wondered when would be the right time to deal with the feelings of inadequacy and self-worth her young patient had. They were beginning to deal with it a little bit, but Yvette knew they'd really only scratched the surface.

Her job wasn't to play matchmaker, it was to get her patient better. She wasn't just interested in getting Elizabeth past this crisis; she was going to help her be well-adjusted for all aspects of her life. By helping Elizabeth that she was deserving of love, that she had good qualities and things she could offer someone, she could hopefully find a loving, healthy relationship. Whether that was with Jason or someone else was beside the point.

Elizabeth stopped talking and looked at the window when the sound of tires crunching over the gravel carried up to the second floor. Yvette smiled and closed her notebook. "Go ahead. I think we're done for today."

"Thanks," she chuckled. "I guess I'm a bit obvious."

"I call it progress. So I'll see you later."

Then Elizabeth was out the door, and Yvette shook her head with a laugh as she heard her running down the stairs.

After Francis walked off, Jason looked back and Elizabeth gave a small grin. "How was your session today?"

"Really good," she smiled brightly. She shifted on her feet and looked out the window next to the door. "It doesn't look like it's going to rain soon. Would...would you like to go for a walk?"

This was the second time she'd asked him to join her. The first time had ended with her hitting him in the garage. He wasn't thinking that would happen this time, he was recognizing the huge step that it was for Elizabeth to suggest it again. They'd spent their time in the library or sitting outside, so he knew it was significant that she was stepping out of her pattern.

"Sure," he agreed. "Let's grab an umbrella in case a storm pops up."

She grabbed one out of the stand by the door and he pulled open the solid wood structure for them. As they walked through the trees to the path that led towards the garage, they didn't say anything. But the silence wasn't uncomfortable or oppressive; instead they were at ease together. It sometimes took Elizabeth a while to get talking, but she wasn't nervous or reluctant like she'd been when they first arrived.

"It looks the same," she said, "but it feels so different."

"Are you alright?" he asked, suddenly concerned. "We don't have to go this way."

She shook her head, her resolve clear. "I've been back here. I came with Yvette while you were still unconscious. It's just still a bit strange."

"You went to the garage?" he questioned. He knew it couldn't have been easy, and he couldn't believe she chose to go.

"I needed to face it," she said. "It actually helped me face what happened with Ric."

She fell silent and he didn't want to push her, but he wondered how she was coping with that. She'd been almost distraught that day in the garage because she didn't feel anything. "Are you feeling better about that?"

Pausing, she looked away, then twirled the umbrella on its tip. "Yvette's helping. Sometimes I think Ric got what he deserved for everything he did."

Jason understood that feeling. He certainly didn't regret the man was dead, he only regretted he hadn't been the person to kill him. He hated that Elizabeth had to do it, and in the manner she did, and have to deal with all the aftermath. "And the other times?"

"I feel guilty because I killed someone, no matter how much he deserved it."

"I'm sorry you feel that way," he said softly. "You shouldn't have had to go through something like that."

"You don't have to feel sorry," she shook her head and started to walk again. "This didn't happen because of you. You can't control everything, and you couldn't have prevented this any more than you had power over Tom Baker."

His stomach tightened as she mentioned her rapist's name. Because of what had happened to Emily he'd had informants inside prison watching Baker. When he realized the man was the same person who had attacked Elizabeth, he had begun plotting the man's death. When Baker was released next spring, Jason had a plan to extract revenge for Emily and Elizabeth, and ensure Baker never hurt another woman the way Elizabeth had. It wasn't a name Elizabeth spoke very often, but he figured she must have been talking about him to her doctor. Dr. Torres must be doing a good job helping Elizabeth deal with it, because she didn't look skittish or ready to jump at the smallest sound.

"But you know what, Jason?"

"What?" he asked, as they neared the garage and they slowed.

"It makes you a good friend to want to protect me from that. I know you're not trying to shelter me or lock me away, you just wish I didn't have to go through something like that." She walked over to the garage and rested her hand on the door. "I wish I didn't have to go through some experiences either, but I've made it through bad things before and I know I can do it again now."

"I know you can, too," he spoke. She turned around to face him, a small smile gracing her face as she slipped her hand in her pocket.

"After I was raped...I thought it was Lucky who put me back together, and when we thought he died, I didn't think I could make it. But then I met you and you helped me realize I wasn't giving myself enough credit."

"All I did was talk to you."

"That's what you think," she laughed. "I realized that I was strong and that I could survive Lucky's death. Well, I know I'm strong now, and I'm surviving this. I know that I've done it all on my own…and also with the help of some very good people as well. You and Yvette have helped me, supported me, given me that time and space to work through everything."

"I didn't do anything," he protested as he shook his head. "You and your doctor did the hard work.

She grinned again and he marveled at how much easier her smiles were coming these days. "Nope, you're going to have to accept my gratitude. I know I wasn't very receptive to you at first, and that I was basically a brat, but you helped me because I knew you were there and that you believed in me. You helped me much more than either one of us really knew at first, and I'm trying to tell you thank you. So stop fighting me on it."

"Alright, alright," he chuckled, taking in her crossed arms and fired-up eyes.

"Good. Now let's talk about where we go from here."

Chapter 32

"From here?" Jason questioned. "I-I don't understand."

"You're getting better," Elizabeth said, trying - yet failing - to explain what she felt. "I'm getting better. What happens when we're both better?"

He frowned at her. "I don't know. We do whatever you want."

"And what do you want to do?" she pressed.

"Me?"

"Yes. This always seems to be about me. Get me better, make sure I'm safe, that I have a doctor. You have been a wonderful friend," she told him. She didn't want him to think she was bitter or ungrateful for all that he'd done. "But what do you want to do?"

"Do you want me to leave?" he asked, his forehead furrowed in question. "Is that what this is about?"

"No," she said immediately, shaking her head. "I don't want you to leave, but I can't keep being selfish with your time...with your life."

He sighed and leaned against the side of the garage with his good arm. He hid a wince as he shifted his arm in the cast and she felt like a jerk for keeping him standing when he should be sitting. "Come on," she said as she reached for the door and opened it. "You need to sit down. See, this is what I mean."

"Hey, hey, stop," he said, as they walked inside and he sat on a stool near the work bench. "You are not being selfish, Elizabeth, just because you don't want me to leave."

"I am if you want to leave," she told him.

"Have I said I want to leave?" he asked.

"No. But that's what I'm trying to ask."

He looked up at the ceiling and sighed. "I don't want to leave, Elizabeth. I thought we already covered this."

She stood in the middle of the garage and wrapped her arms around her middle. "People can always change their minds. You can always do that. Have you thought about a year from now, five years from now? Are you going to spend the rest of your life babysitting me?"

"That's not what I'm doing," he interjected.

She kept going as if he hadn't spoken. "What about a life, Jason? I...I know you're not with Courtney anymore, but what about a family? You deserve to find someone who will love you...you deserve to have a family of your own. How are you going to have that if you're with me all the time?"

He slumped on the stool and watched her with confusion and a hint of disbelief. "Why...why are you worrying about this?"

Because she needed to remind herself that he didn't feel the same way she did. He was her friend, that she definitely believed. But that didn't mean he would ever care for her the way he once did, or that he would ever love her. If she remembered that, if she kept it in mind, it would be easier for her to not get too attached or expect him to make her his life.

"Because you deserve that kind of life," she finally said. You think you don't, but you do. I know how much you loved Michael, and I know how great of a father you will be. How can I keep you from having that? You're my friend, you're more than just a friend and I," she stopped herself from saying she loved him. "I just want the best for you."

He stood and walked slowly towards her. "Then you need to believe me when I tell you that what's best for me is to stay here with you."

She shook her head and backed up. "No. No, I'm not what's best for you. You have to believe that."

"Don't tell me that," he shook his head. "I decide what's best for me."

"But how can you think that's me? A friend who's done nothing but hurt you?"

"You're not just a friend," he said softly. "You've never been just a friend, and you know that."

She put a motorcycle between them, her heart pounding in her ears as she took in his soft, earnest expression. This wasn't supposed to be how this conversation went. He was supposed to see she was right and agree with her. He wasn't supposed to fight her.

"The past doesn't matter to me, Elizabeth," he said, not moving. He seemed to recognize she was skittish, feeling panicked, and he wasn't going to crowd her. He also was probably afraid she'd lash out at him. "It doesn't matter what we've done, it only matters what we do."

"No," she whispered. "You can't mean that. You just can't."

"I'm not trying to push you," he took a step back. "I know you're not ready to hear this, and I'm not trying to scare you. When I brought you here, it was solely for you to get better. I promised both of us I wasn't going to try and push for anything. Your friendship would be enough."

She watched him as he sat back down on the stool and his shoulders slumped. "The last thing I ever want is for you to feel uncomfortable around me."

The way he was talking, she would almost believe he had feelings for her. But...but it just couldn't be. "Don't," she shook her head. "You don't mean that and that's really unfair for you to pretend otherwise. You've never acted like you feel more than you do for me before. Don't do it now."

Then she turned and ran from the garage, unable to believe Jason would be so deliberately taunting and cruel with his feelings.

Jason watched Elizabeth run from the garage in frustration and confusion. He couldn't understand why Elizabeth seemed so spooked by the idea that he might care for her beyond friendship. He hadn't meant to let her know, but he couldn't help it when she started trying to get him to leave and talking about how she was holding him back from finding love.

He knew she was still frightened and unsure about a lot of things. He'd expected her to fight him, to pull back, to run away. And he walked right into the fight because he couldn't stand to see her to confused and thinking he wouldn't want her. Or that somehow he was better off finding someone else.

He'd tried that with Courtney, and it didn't work. Elizabeth at least didn't seem to think he'd be leaving her to return to Courtney, but she still was stuck on him moving on from her. He knew if he tried to explain why he'd gotten involved with Courtney it would only make Elizabeth run all the more. She wouldn't listen to him about why he'd gotten involved with another woman, and she sure wouldn't listen to him about why he wanted to be with her.

It seemed no matter what he said or did she was just determined to misinterpret his motives and meanings. She seemed set on doing everything she could to push him away and keep her distance. Frustrated by not knowing what he could do to make her believe him, he stood and kicked the stool over.

It felt good as he heard it clatter to the floor, that he turned and swept all the tools on the bench behind off onto the floor. He didn't even care about the loud noises they made, pinging off the concrete. It felt good to just lose control for a minute; to release the hold on his anger and frustration and just let it all come pouring out like a river bursting its dam.

He raged, and he didn't care what was destroyed. The work bench was splintered, the windows smashed out, and both his motorcycles were dented and battered. He'd even managed to punch a hole in the empty fuel tank. He was sitting on the floor, breathing hard and feeling a bit dizzy when Francis pushed open the door.

"Jason?" he asked hesitantly as he pushed his way inside. He took a look around and gave a low whistle. "What happened?"

"I happened. I was a little upset."

"Obviously," he deadpanned. "Question is, why?"

"I frightened Elizabeth," he sighed and rubbed his hand over his face. "The last I wanted to do was spook her, yet she ran out of here like a frightened mouse."

"What happened?" Francis asked as he cleared a space on the floor and sat down.

Jason sighed again and tipped his head back. "I got too close. She's got it in her head for some reason that she's not good enough for me. She wants me to be happy and wonders how that can happen, how I can find a wife and have children if I'm stuck here with her because she's being selfish."

"So you told her you wanted to be here with her, that she wasn't selfish," Francis surmised correctly, "and she-"

"Completely freaked. She doesn't want to hear that I care for her...that I...that I love her."

His friend didn't react to that admission except to ask, "You didn't tell her that, did you?"

"No. But I told her she wasn't just a friend to me. That's when she ran."

"Because you two have never named what you are to each other, except to say you're more than friends. To say that again," he nodded his head sagely. "I can see where it might spook her a bit."

"Thanks," Jason laughed dryly.

"Oh give yourself a break, Jason," Francis scoffed. "Whether you want to admit it, you really are just human. You've been great, and you've been noble saying how it's more important she gets better than know how you feel and think you're pushing her. But you're not a machine, and you can think about what you want instead of putting everyone else's needs first."

"And we see how well it worked," he snapped.

"You told her she was more than a friend, it wasn't like you proposed. Sure, she got a little spooked, but it's not irreparable harm."

Feeling defeated he lolled his head to the side. "And how do you figure that?"

"You pushed her out of her comfort zone. Most of all you let her know that you do care, that you feel some sort of emotion towards her."

"She knows I care."

The sandy-haired man shook his head. "As a friend. You let her know you feel more, maybe even want more. Once she gets over being freaked, she'll know better where she stands with you."

Jason scowled and shook his head, trying to push himself up. "Where she stands with me? Stop hanging out with Yvette and listening to all her touchy-feeling emotional junk. Elizabeth knows where she stands with me."

"Does she?" Francis challenged, not moving to help as Jason continued to struggle. "Did you ever tell her? Really tell her, not just expect her to read your mind?"

A memory of them at Vista Point flashed into his mind. Elizabeth accused him of not saying what he really meant, of being deliberately vague. Maybe she and Francis were right. He said things like she knew how he felt about her, when she said she didn't and was practically begging him to put it into concise, unmistakable words. Of course he hadn't, he'd walked away from her and left her sitting there crying.

His friend watched as Jason's shoulders sagged. "That's what I thought. So somehow despite all that you two get to a point where you think you've got a shot and it disappears. Instead of really working on it, going after and making her believe how much you care you give up and worst, you move on. Is it any wonder why she's frightened now? And of course she's going to fight you when you tell her she's not just a friend, but more. She's afraid you're going to change your mind again and hurt her."

"Alright," Jason said, "alright, I get your point. She's scared. I have to do more because it was all my fault. Right?"

"No," he shook his head. "It wasn't all your fault, it wasn't all hers. I'm trying to get you to see why she's scared and fighting you instead of just believing you."

"How do I get her to believe me if she won't even talk to me?" he asked. Francis shrugged and Jason merely shook his head in renewed frustration. "Great. Maybe I should just go to Puerto Rico for a while. Stay with Doc until I'm better."

Chapter 33

Francis looked at Jason and fought against the urge to smack his friend until his ears bled. "Have you completely lost your mind?"

When Jason just looked away, he stood up and stalked across the garage, leaving the younger man still sitting on the floor, unable to stand up. "That's a great way of letting her know you care. Run away with your tail tucked between your legs."

"I don't want Elizabeth to be uncomfortable."

It was a good thing Jason couldn't stand up because otherwise Francis would be in danger of getting his butt kicked. "Oh yes," he mocked, "by all means let's spare Elizabeth's feelings."

"Watch it, Francis," Jason growled, pushing against the floor again in an attempt to stand.

"You're using that as an excuse and you know it. You're afraid you might actually have to work and you'd rather throw your hands in the air, claim you tried and just walk away."

"You have no idea what you're talking about," he said like a petulant child.

"Bull," the guard shot back. "You may not know how much you've revealed when you talked with me, but let me tell you my take on it. You felt Elizabeth couldn't handle your job, you tried to talk to her, she shot you down, you fell into the first available bed because it was easier than actually working."

"Shut up!"

"No. Because even you know there's truth mixed in with the lies." He paused and crossed his arms over his chest. "Why did Elizabeth leave you?"

"I...I thought she couldn't handle my job," he said with some reluctance.

"Thought?"

"She was having a PTSD episode because she was alone and she was afraid."

"She was alone because you were avoiding her," Francis pointed out. "And when she objected to the way you did your job - because I never saw her run from your job or disparage it, even when Sorrel threatened her after you left - she lashed out. You were hurt, understandably so," he said when Jason started to protest, "and you acted in the pain just like she did. You said to me you should have seen she was lashing out."

Jason sighed and leaned his head against the wall. "Yeah."

"Both of you exacerbated the situation, but you took the easy way out by hooking up with Courtney. She pursued you when Elizabeth was pushing you away. Of course you'd hook up with her. You've never had to work for a girlfriend. They all chase after you. When Elizabeth stopped, you figured why should I try, she obviously isn't worth it so you went with the woman who was panting over you."

"I get your point, colorful as always," his friend said drolly.

"Let's hope so. So tell me again how you running off to Puerto Rico is going to convince Elizabeth she's who you want to be with?"

"It won't," he said on a defeated sigh.

Progress. Francis let out a breath and crossed the room, reaching out to help Jason to his feet. "It's okay to get discouraged, Jason, and I'll listen to you rant, rave and even cry. But don't think I'll just sit by and let you do something stupid without trying to fight you on it."

"Thanks, Francis," he said softly though sincerely. "I hate putting you in the middle of all this."

"I'm not in the middle," the guard shook his head. "I'm helping out friends, but I'm never picking sides. I'll call her on her crap too if I have to."

Jason paused on their way to the door and Francis thought for a minute he'd say something about his last remark, but instead his friend just looked around the garage. "I really messed this place up, didn't I?"

"Imagine what you coulda done with two good arms," Francis laughed. "I'll come down later and clean it up."

Jason shook his head adamantly. "Just replace the windows. I'll take care of it."

"You sure?" he questioned. "It's not a problem."

"I said I'll do it. I want to do it."

He shrugged and accepted Jason's declaration. "Alright. Fine. I'll get the windows replaced and leave the rest up to you. I'll get some boards over them at least for tonight in case a storm comes through."

"I appreciate it, Francis," Jason thanked him. "I needed a little sense knocked into me."

"Just helping out."

"Rather eagerly." He tried to sound gruff, but Francis knew it was all just a ruse. "You may think you're safe 'cause I can't kick your butt right now, but I'm keeping a list. And when I'm better, you better watch your back."

"Whatever you say, man," he shook his head and tightened his grip around Jason who leaned heavier into him. "Whatever you say."

At the same though, he'd watch himself when Jason was recovered, because sometimes when it seemed he was joking he truly was plotting.

Yvette was crossing the foyer when the front door opened and Jason and Francis walked in. The younger man was leaning against the guard looking pale and exhausted.

"What happened?" she asked, coming closer to inspect him. "Are you alright?"

"I'm okay," he said, standing straighter. "I'm just tired. I'm going to go up to my room."

"Okay, let's go," Francis said.

Jason shook his head, released his arm from around the other man and started for the stairs. "I'll be fine."

She looked over at Francis, then back to Jason, clearly concerned about the ability of the young man to actually make it up the stairs. She wasn't going to stand by and let him fall, she didn't care what macho crap Francis would let him pull. Yvette took a step towards Jason just as he reached the stairs, but Francis put a hand on her arm and stopped her. Ready to blast him, he shook his head sternly.

"He and Elizabeth had a thing...a bit of an argument, and he got a little upset and trashed the garage," he said low under his breath while keeping an eye on Jason making his way slowly up the stairs and leaning heavily on the rail. "He doesn't want her to know he got upset and that he's not doing so good."

She sighed and shook her head slowly. She didn't like it, but she'd hold back for now and let Jason try to do it his way. After a couple of hours she'd go up and check on him, hoping it would appear normal.

Now she understood a little better Elizabeth's arrival earlier. Yvette had been sitting in the sun room reading when she heard the door slam and light footsteps running up the stairs. She'd come out of the room cautiously, wondering if Jason would walk in, but she never heard him. When she reached the second floor Elizabeth had already slammed her bedroom door shut. Yvette stopped outside the door and listen, but the young woman was silent. She knocked once and called for Elizabeth, but there was no answer and she decided she'd respect her patience privacy for the moment.

She'd looked out the window towards the direction Elizabeth and Jason had walked, but she didn't see him anywhere on the grounds. Not wanting to be reactionary, but concerned about Elizabeth and also Jason, she'd been ready to call Francis. She'd rather find out Jason was okay and that maybe he and Elizabeth just had a disagreement, than to not say anything and find out something had happened to Jason again.

Now, as she watched Jason slowly make his way up the stairs she knew something had happened, although not what she feared. She could feel Francis's tension and worry as he stood beside her. They stood still, silent and listening to Jason's slow, labored footsteps reach the second floor, make his way to his room and then shut the door.

Once she heard the door click shut, she turned to Francis. "What exactly happened out there? I'm beginning to think that garage is cursed."

"They were talking, I don't know about everything, but she got spooked when he said she was more than just a friend to him."

Understanding began to dawn on Yvette. "She felt he was getting too close. She's so terrified of letting anyone too close to her. For him to say that..."

Francis just nodded. "So now he's doing what he does best, he's beating himself up for making her feel uncomfortable and was thinking about going to Puerto Rico to give her space."

"And so he trashed the garage?"

"It was a mess," he shook his head. "He needed to blow off steam. And now he's a little calmer, he's not going to leave…but I imagine he's going to hide out and avoid her."

There was no doubt in her mind either. And she knew Elizabeth would do the same. The young woman would probably take to eating her meals in her room again and do everything she could to stay clear of Jason.

She knew now that she definitely needed to work with Elizabeth and her self-esteem as she'd been thinking about earlier that day. Elizabeth needed to see she was worthy of love, of having someone care about her. Yvette didn't care if it was with Jason, thought she could see how much he loved Elizabeth and how much she cared for him; the doctor just wanted the young woman to heal this terrible wound on her soul and her psyche.

Elizabeth lay on her bed, her tears having finally subsided, but still sniffling. She didn't want to Jason to care about her. She didn't want to hear him say he thought of her as more than a friend.

While she might have fantasies of Jason loving her and them being happy together, that's all they were, fantasies. They were dreams and fairytales, but they certainly weren't reality. The reality was she just wasn't the kind of person people fell in love with and wanted to spend forever with. Things didn't last for her, and she knew it wouldn't with Jason. Sooner or later he'd realize what everyone else did and he'd leave. He was supposed to just be her friend and not know she had a crush on him. Why couldn't he just follow her plan?

Elizabeth wished she had someone she could talk to. Someone who wasn't here, or wouldn't think it was okay if Jason had feelings for her. Her grandmother would have fit that bill nicely, and her tears started anew as she despaired because of her grandmother's death. She missed the one person who had loved her the most. Sure sometimes Elizabeth disappointed her, but her grandmother was always there for her.

"Elizabeth?"

Yvette's soft voice carried through the door and Elizabeth wished her doctor would go away. She didn't want to talk to anybody right now, no matter how well intentioned. She rolled over, putting her back to the door as Dr. Torres knocked once again. "Elizabeth?"

There was a soft, metallic clicking and the door opened. "Elizabeth?"

She closed her eyes and hoped Yvette wouldn't see the tears still coming, and just think she was asleep. Her doctor walked around the bed and sat down. The older woman remained quiet, but she reached out and rested her hand on Elizabeth's leg, just above her knee. When the touch became Elizabeth's undoing, causing her to turn her face into the pillow and cry even harder, she just rubbed her leg lightly and gently squeezed in reassurance.

"Elizabeth? What's wrong? What happened with Jason?"

She shook her head and buried her face even more as she clutched the comforter tighter in her hands.

"Okay, okay," Yvette said soothingly. "I won't push. But, Elizabeth, you're going to make yourself ill. Maybe you should try to get some sleep and we'll talk later."

Elizabeth shook her head again. She didn't want to sleep and she didn't want to talk later, what she wanted was her grandmother.

"Elizabeth," Yvette tried again. "I'm your doctor and I'm your friend, and right now as both I'm worried about you."

"Please go away," Elizabeth begged desperately. "Please leave me alone. Can't you see I don't want to talk, I don't want your comfort, I just want to be alone. Please...please just leave me alone."

Chapter 34

Three weeks.

For three weeks the tension in the house grew exponentially as Jason sulked and kept to his garage, and Elizabeth stayed holed up in her room. On the rare occasion that she ventured out, she floated through the rooms of the house, quiet and specter-like. She avoided Jason, fled from rare encounters with Francis, and was difficult and withdrawn with Yvette.

Francis watched both of them fade into themselves until he wondered if they'd ever come out. Jason was meticulously, almost anally, putting the garage back into order. He refused to let Francis help him, choosing instead a local from the guard detail. The man only spoke Spanish and Jason's knowledge of the language was limited, but it fit Jason's preference for limited conversations.

Dr. Torres was very protective of Elizabeth's privacy, but he could tell she was frustrated with the situation. The normally calm, unflappable doctor was becoming snappish and short-tempered. A second coffee pot filled with decaf had appeared in the kitchen a week-and-a-half ago because she said she couldn't handle caffeine from all the extra coffee she was drinking and she started showing up in the gym to work off her tension.

Francis was quite a regular in the gym Jason had set up so that he could have a place to work off his frustration over Elizabeth shutting him out. Poetic now that Francis was using it because Jason was making him crazy. He also went there so he didn't make the guards crazy by constantly being down at the guard house, or hyper-scrutinizing the rotation schedules and shift logs. Francis was rapidly getting to be in the best shape he'd been in years.

Currently he was pounding the stuffing out of a punching bag as sweat dripped down his face and stung his eyes. An hour before he had sat in the kitchen with Yvette having lunch. Francis had been a little skeptical when the good doctor came to him a week ago and said they should stop coddling Jason and Elizabeth. She wasn't going to let her patient continue to hide out while being catered to and Jason was a grown man who could either join them for meals or fix his own food. They announced the times that breakfast, lunch and dinner would be served - same time, every day - and Jason and Elizabeth were responsible for getting themselves there and getting their own meals.

Jason usually came right when the food was set on the table, loaded up a plate and disappeared off to the garage. Sometimes he sent Guillermo, his helper, to tell them Jason would be joining the guards to eat. Elizabeth usually showed up when the meal was almost over. She put a few things on her plate and scarfed them down quickly before beating back up to her room. It was a pattern that went on every meal, until today.

Today Jason was late, showing up covered in sawdust and motor oil and swearing a blue streak under his breath. Elizabeth was earlier than normal, actually beating Jason. She must have been hungry because she was taking more food than Francis had seen her eat in a while. He was actually glad to see it, because even he could tell Elizabeth's clothes were beginning to hang off her due to the weight she'd lost, and he knew Yvette was getting worried.

Elizabeth was in the middle of eating when the kitchen door opened and Jason walked in. It was like watching a car wreck in slow motion and Francis was horrified, yet unable to do anything. Elizabeth looked up and paused, her fork mid-air, halfway to her mouth. Jason's head was down, but when he heard Elizabeth's quiet gasp, he snapped it up and stared wide-eye in disbelief.

Francis knew it was only seconds, but it felt like time slowed and stretched as they regarded each other. Then, the spell was broken when the fork slipped out of Elizabeth's fingers and clattered onto the plate. She stood so fast her chair actually tipped over and she ran from the room, leaving her plate on the table. Jason watched her retreating figure, his shoulders dropping and a shadow passing over his face. Without a word he turned around and left the kitchen. Francis doubted he'd eat with the guards later.

Letting out his own guttural curse, Francis spun and kicked the heavy bag, then followed it up with two blistering punches. He could feel the bite of the leather through his gloves and knew his hands were going to be sore after this. Yvette had chewed him out five days ago when he'd been so hasty to start punching he forgot about protective gear and split the skin on his knuckles. She'd probably chide him again for this.

"You are not a young man, Francis." Her voice carried across the room, startling him and causing him to spin around. "You can't keep punishing yourself like this."

"Better than punching a brick wall," he grumbled, dropping his rubbery and aching arms to his side.

"Francis, you can't keep letting them get to you like this," she said as she crossed the room and reached for one of his hands. Sliding the glove off she winced at the bruises and the blood she found. "They're adults, when they choose to remember and act so, who are incredibly frightened and angry. So they're acting withdrawn and reclusive. Nothing you or I do will really change anything, until they're ready."

"Yeah," he grumped as she reached for his other hand.

"You're not responsible for what happened to them, and you're a good man for wanting to help them, but you have got to let it go a little." She switched from serious and gave him a slight smile. "I can't have three patients to take care of. I need somebody to help keep me sane."

He gave a small chuckle. "Okay. I'll go a little easier on the punching bag."

"Good," she nodded and reached for her gloves. "Because it's my turn to beat the stuffing out of the thing."

Elizabeth sat in the plush chair, looking out over the yard through her window. From her position, she could see the path that went down to Jason's garage, though she couldn't see the actual structure. She knew that Jason hadn't been in the house very much since their disastrous encounter in the garage, but she hadn't known what he was doing. It appeared he was working down there and she shook her head at him. He was going to hurt himself doing crazy things like that before he was healed.

He probably felt it was better than sitting in a house all day while she avoided him. Plus, Jason had never been a person who liked to sit around doing nothing; it had been hard enough for him to be bed-ridden or confined to the house with his larger cast. He probably wouldn't even care about hurting himself as long as it gave him an excuse to be away from her, and she couldn't say that she blamed him.

Once again she had been completely unfair to him. Through the course of their sessions, Yvette had begun to point out that Jason had been nothing but honest with her. Her doctor also tried to get her to see that she wasn't a misfit or an awful person, and she certainly wasn't damaged with nothing to offer anyone.

"I don't care if you and Jason get married, let alone kiss," Yvette had said one day when Elizabeth got upset and accused her of playing matchmaker. "What I care about is you thinking you have nothing to offer any man. Be honest and say you don't love Jason and that's why there's no future for the two of you. But stop hiding behind this notion that you should be noble and let him find someone else who could make him happy. The martyr routine is getting a little old, Elizabeth."

Yvette also asked how long Elizabeth intended to punish Jason for not telling her about Sonny's death and then getting involved with Courtney when she had insisted he ruined every chance for them to be together. Elizabeth insisted that wasn't what she was doing, but her doctor fixed her with a pointed look that clearly conveyed she didn't believe a word the younger woman was saying. She had remained resolute in her beliefs, but now Elizabeth wasn't so sure.

She was holding the past against Jason. It was easy to believe Jason was lying to her now because he had let her believe Sonny was dead, and then asked her to keep his and Courtney's dirty little secret. She easily believed all that Jason felt for her was pity because Courtney told her Jason said he never loved Elizabeth and that she had made their whole relationship up in her head. Because of her PTSD the blonde's words had cut deep and she sadly realized it had to be true.

Now she realized that it wasn't. Maybe Jason didn't love, but maybe he could. He had walked away from Courtney, his family and Sonny just for her, and he'd done it without her asking him to or expecting him to put her first. But he had done it all the same, and it spoke volumes. She finally was letting herself listen to what he had been saying to her.

If he had felt just pity or merely guilt for her, he wouldn't be this bothered by her actions. Jason didn't pine away, or tear himself up over things he didn't consider important. She wasn't blind, she could see the shadows under Jason's eyes and that his face looked stretched and thinner. When his eyes had met hers for the first time in three week, she could see he looked haunted. It reminded her of the punched-in-the-gut look he would wear back when she kept running to him because she couldn't stay away, but kept telling him she loved Lucky.

Part of her, the part that desperately wanted to ask Yvette but was afraid, wondered if Jason would still care for her after all that she had done to him. She bounced back and forth between him and Lucky, asking him if he felt something more than just friendship, and then stomping all over his heart when she said she didn't want to be free, she wanted to be with Lucky. Add to that everything she said and did with Zander and then viciously turning on him after telling him she could handle his life and that her face wouldn't change, and she felt disgusted by herself for how she treated him.

Just because she said and did things while having a PTSD episode didn't negate the hurt she had caused Jason. In her desire to punish herself and atone for all the damage she had done, she appeared to have caused more hurt. She just didn't seem to know how to stop hurting Jason when all she desperately wanted was for him to be happy. It seemed the more she did, the more things were wrong, until she was caught in a vicious cycle of trying futilely to stop it.

Elizabeth sighed and rubbed her hands over her arms to ward off the chill that seemed to have settled deep into her bones. Her mind seemed like it was fogged, not by drugs meant to help her, but by unending confusion and despair. She didn't know what to think or what to say to anybody. She felt small and weak for the tears that sprang to her eyes, but they had become quite a common occurrence since the day she fought with Jason.

Slowly unfolding herself from her chair and grimacing as sharp needles of pain signified her circulation was returning to her legs, she limped over to the bed to lie down. Drawing her blanket over her, she turned her face into the pillow and once again cried herself to sleep.

Chapter 35

He wasn't sure what woke him, but the minute he opened his eyes in the dark room he knew something was off. Something was out of place in the house, and he stirred, listening for the sound that had pulled him from his slumber. Then he heard the sound again, a soft creak of the floorboards. Settling back down on the bed, he shook his head at himself and attempted to go back to sleep now that he knew the origin of the foreign noise.

He was almost asleep when he heard a muffled thump and stifled curses. Whoever was out there was trying to be quiet, and that piqued his curiosity. Glancing over at the clock he frowned when he saw it was two in the morning. Francis wouldn't be on patrol of the house, and that was all whom Jason could think would be out and about.

Quietly Jason put his feet on the floor and crossed the room to peer out the door. Brown hair disappeared down the stairs and he knew without a doubt it was Elizabeth. He wondered what she was doing up this late and why she was walking around in the dark. Then he heard the kitchen door open and softly click shut. Unabashed curiosity and concern had him deciding to follow her.

He slipped his feet into an old pair of shoes and grabbed a shirt, pulling it on as he walked into the hallway. Quickly making his way down the stairs, he rapidly crossed the kitchen and opened the door in time to see the glow of a flashlight disappear into the trees. He grabbed a flashlight from a drawer so he wouldn't be slowed down trying to avoid tripping and he stepped outside.

Jason didn't understand where she was going or why, but at this time of the night he was certainly going to follow her to make sure she was alright. She could go anywhere on the property on this path, but instead she branched off towards his garage. Frowning, he followed, wondering why she would choose to go there.

By the time he reached the garage she was already inside, and he slowed, looking in through the window. Elizabeth had turned on the small work lights, not the main overhead ones, and she was cast in shadows as she stood in the middle of the room. She slowly turned around, seemingly taking in the place and he wondered what she was thinking. He and Guillermo had done a lot of work to the room, but it was still clear that things had been broken.

Jason had decided that since he was going to have to make repairs, he might as well remodel. The guard was a hard worker, followed instructions and didn't ask too many questions, especially of a personal nature. Jason knew Francis would have gladly helped out, but all he would want to do was talk about Elizabeth and why Jason had done all the damage. He just wanted the quiet peace of working beside someone without a lot of talking; Guillermo provided that.

Watching as Elizabeth slowly circled the room, he tensed when she approached the damaged motorcycle. She crouched down beside it and her figure was lost partially from view, but when she stood up she brushed at the wetness glistening on her cheeks. His forehead furrowed as he watched a melancholy look settle on her face. He didn't want her to be sad because of anything, much less because of what he'd done to his bike.

Realizing she was walking towards the door he took a step back, but the door opened and a rectangle of light spilled across the ground. "Jason," she called out, standing just inside the door.

He froze, wondering what she would say, having caught him following her. "E-Elizabeth."

She smiled tremulously at him. "Relax. I'm not going to flip out on you."

He let out a soft breath, but still felt uneasy at her talking to him like everything was okay. Like the past three weeks hadn't happened. "I...I didn't mean to crowd you, but I heard you leave the house and I was concerned. I-I can go."

Shaking her head she stepped back into the garage. "No. I...I'm glad you're here. I-I'd actually like to talk to you."

"Are you sure?"

She ran her hand over the gas tank of the bike and laughed wryly. "We haven't really had the best of luck here, have we? I mean, there was the whole me mistaking you for Ric - although how anyone could really confuse you two is absurd - and breaking your arm along with giving you a concussion."

"Elizabeth," he tried to interrupt, but she was rambling too fast to recognize his attempt.

"And then there was the most recent freak out," she said, and her self-scathing tone tore at him. He hated that she would direct such harsh judgment at herself, as if by tearing herself down he would somehow agree with her.

He tried again, "Elizabeth."

"I wanted to apologize," she said, ignoring his attempt and catching him off guard.

"A-apologize?"

"I...I flipped out on you because I was...projecting. Pushing my fears on you, hoping that I could make things true because I wanted them to be, instead of facing what was really there."

"I don't want you to be afraid, Elizabeth," he said with a shake of his head.

"I know," she smiled wanly. "That's what makes you so wonderful."

"No," he said quickly, "I don't want you to think I'm some wonderful person who can't do anything wrong, Elizabeth. I'm not perfect…and I don't want you thinking I am."

"I don't, Jason," she said softly, as if sensing where his distress was coming from. The night she walked out on him after learning the truth about Sonny, she said she had made him up in her mind. She had created this perfect, unrealistic image of him. So when she perceived he lied to her, it shook her hard. He knew now it was part of a PTSD episode, but her losing faith in him seemed to knock him off balance, off course. He didn't want her to think he was perfect because that would only lead to disappointment again. For both of them.

"I know you aren't perfect, Jason," she said. "Neither am I, and yet somehow you accept me. Well, I accept you too, warts and all. My eyes are wide open this time and I'm not making you up in my mind." Then she smiled slyly, "But I still think you're a wonderful man."

He was blushing. Jason Morgan was actually blushing. If she wasn't so nervous about making sure this conversation went well - went right - she might have been more amused.

It was time to stop hiding, and most of all it was time to be honest. Even if the thought terrified her. She didn't blame Jason for looking nervous, she was sure her sudden change of wanting him near, as opposed to avoiding him, was confusing.

"Like I said," she began, her hands shaking slightly as they hovered near the damaged motorcycle, "I want to apologize for yelling at you and running away."

"It's okay, Elizabeth," he said soothingly.

"No, it's really not," she shook her head. "I got freaked out because you were honest. I thought I was so sure I knew what this was all about, that when you began talking about being more than friends I got scared."

He sighed as if the weight of Atlas was on his shoulders. "I never wanted you to feel like I was pushing you, Elizabeth. That's not why-"

"You did this," she finished. "I know. But I...I needed to hear it. I kept telling myself that you did this because you pitied me. Poor Elizabeth got herself into a mess and as usual here comes Jason to save the day. You were only doing this because I once saved your life."

"No," he denied. "That's not-"

"I know," she smiled as she interrupted. "But that's what I told myself. Then when you kept telling me it wasn't pity, it was because we were friends; I latched onto that with both hands. Friends. Nothing more. You would go back to Courtney one day and we would just be friends. When Emily told me you were no longer with Courtney...I had to keep telling myself that eventually you'd find someone else and we would only ever just be friends."

His eyebrows dipped in question. "You had to? I don't..."

"I had to tell myself we were just friends," she said softly, dropping her gaze to the cracked concrete floor. I needed to remind myself of that so that when you found someone to love it wouldn't hurt so much when you left."

She bit her lip, refusing to look up to see Jason's expression. Silence reigned in the garage and she feared she was right. Jason was just her friend. Maybe more than friends meant their relationship was like his with Carly. Jason wasn't in love with Carly, but he had her in his life and would do anything for her.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, feeling hot tears of embarrassment burn her eyes. "This is what I wanted to avoid. You don't have to worry; I won't do anything to make you feel uncomfortable."

"Elizabeth." She refused to acknowledge him or look up and he cleared his throat. "Elizabeth? Please look at me."

Slowly she raised her eyes, afraid to see the soft rejection she was sure was coming. Instead, Jason was leaning against one of the completed benches, his face full of awe and disbelief. "You didn't make uncomfortable…and you won't."

He shuffled slightly on his feet and ran his hand through his hair. "You're my friend and you always have been. I...I know in the months before we left Port Charles it was strained between us, but I never forgot you or stopped caring about you. I told you before that it killed me we had drifted so far apart that I didn't know what was happening with you or if you would accept my help."

"I know," she said, remembering that conversation, as well as the warmth and fear it brought her.

"That's when I realized what I'd done and what I'd been trying to deny." He paused and licked his lips. "I tried to fill the void after you left, pretend I wasn't hurt or affected by your words by just denying everything I felt for you. But I can't anymore...I won't."

Her heart raced in her chest and her mouth felt dry. She could see him nervously swallow, "But I knew it wouldn't be right for me to say anything. I didn't want you to think that was the only reason I helped you. Because I was expecting something from you."

She nodded and the corners of her mouth turned up slightly. "That's why I said you were a good person, Jason. I never felt that way, I felt safe, and I knew I'd be able to get batter. It was while I was getting better and dealing with Ric...that's when I began dealing with my feelings for you."

He remained silent, even though his face showed surprise over her words. "I was mad at you, and in order not to feel hurt that we didn't work out I had to stay mad and act like you were someone I didn't know. But I do know you, and I was trying to deny I did when I got involved with Ric. I tried to make him into what I felt you weren't, but what I wanted you to be, and I was so desperate for him to be that, that I overlooked all the danger signs."

Sighing, she leaned against a bench across from him and pushed both hands through her hair. "As I finally dealt with all that Ric had done, and I realized it was Ric I'd made up in my head and not you, that's when I knew that what I felt for you had never gone away. But I didn't want to be the silly little girl mooning over you."

"Which is why you kept trying to get me to leave, or telling me I'd meet someone and fall in love with them," he filled in, his voice low and emotion-filled.

She nodded in confirmation. "It was a reminder that we were just friends and I couldn't hold you back."

He straightened and crossed the room, stopping a short distance away so he didn't crowd her. "You aren't holding me back. I want you to understand that, Elizabeth. I'm right where I want to be, I don't want to think about meeting anyone else. I've already met the most wonderful woman and I can't imagine finding someone better. Do you believe that?"

Tears welled up in her eyes and as she squeezed them shut some escaped, but she quickly dashed them away. Opening her eyes, her gaze was watery, but determined. "I do, Jason. I...I believe it."

Chapter 36

Jason let out a breath he'd been holding deep inside and his shoulders drooped slightly. He kept half-expecting Elizabeth to change her mind, to say she didn't believe him and run away again. Instead, she actually took a step closer to him as she dashed tears off her face once again.

"I'm not going to pretend this is easy for me, Jason," she said. "There is still so much inside me, and sometimes I fall back into a pattern of looking at everything you say with distrust. I do it to protect myself and it could take a little while to stop that."

"We've both been doing it for so long," he agreed, "but we can do this."

"Yeah," she agreed, "I know we can. I hate fighting with you. I hate the tension between us and I want it to stop."

"I do, too. I know there are things we still need to talk about, and you do so love to talk," he teased her slightly. He knew the mood was getting tense and he didn't want her to get too uncomfortable. She glared at him with a ghost of a smile. "I know that doesn't automatically fix us."

"No," she agreed, "but we can finally start being honest with each other, and that will help. I care about you, Jason. I have for a very long time, and it's exhausting trying to pretend I don't. I'm tired of being afraid to be open about how I feel. If I hadn't been so afraid I would have taken your hand that day in the park."

"Hey, hey," he said, taking a step towards her. "It doesn't do any good to beat yourself up about things in the past."

"Maybe not," she agreed, "but we can't hide from it and ignore them because otherwise old hurts fester until all we see is the wound."

"Okay, okay, but we don't have to talk about it all tonight. We've made a lot of progress already."

She grinned up at him, her eyes twinkling with a lightheartedness he'd missed. "We probably shouldn't press our luck."

"Our luck is fine," he shook his head. He paused and took a breath, "I'm glad I followed you tonight."

"So am I. After I saw you in the kitchen this afternoon I felt...I felt like I wasn't being fair to you and I was worried you'd hurt yourself doing whatever it was you were doing down here. I don't know why, I just felt the need to come down here when I woke up." She bit her lip and looked around. "What happened down here anyways?"

"Me," he said ruefully. He didn't want to make her feel bad or that she was to blame for what happened, but the only way to do that would be to not tell her, and he wasn't going to lie or hide things. "After you ran out I got mad that I'd made you uncomfortable and I…I blew off some steam."

"Oh, Jason," she lamented. "I don't want you doing things like this because of me. You could have hurt yourself."

"But I didn't," he said before she got too fraught.

"Maybe no, but please don't do something like this again. I already feel guilty enough because I broke your arm, please don't hurt yourself further." She took his hand, surprising him, "Please, Jason, say you won't do something like this again."

Her eyes were so large and tender as they pleaded with him. There was no way he could deny her anything when she looked at him like that, "I won't," he promised solemnly.

She threw her arms around him, surprising him even further. Slowly he brought his arms up and encircled her slim frame, careful not to press the cast too tight into her, relishing her touch and the fact that she wasn't shying away from him. She turned her head, resting her cheek against his chest and whispered, "Thank you, Jason. I couldn't stand to see you hurt again."

It seemed so odd to be walking back into the house next to Jason. After all the back and forth emotions and times when they spoke and then when they didn't, there was a part of her that worried just how long this truce would last. She was sure that with some time she'd stop waiting for the bottom to drop out and just trust the moment.

Jason was right when he said there were still things to talk about, but she didn't want to get trapped in going over every little thing from the past. She knew it would be easy on either of them, but they did need to talk about the pain they'd gone through so they didn't inflict it again. She knew there would be stutter steps and setbacks, but for the first time since the night they promised to try, her heart seemed a little lighter.

She was dealing with her PTSD and coming to terms with what happened with Ric, now it seemed like maybe she could finally work through things with Jason. She wasn't ready to admit she loved him, though he probably knew what she felt was beyond the I really care for you she'd said several times that night. Just like she was sure his words meant more too.

Jason opened the door to the kitchen and as they stepped inside she realized she was hungry since she'd napped through dinner. She stopped and looked up at Jason. "I didn't eat any dinner tonight."

"Hungry?" he asked with a small grin.

"A little bit. How 'bout you? I could fix us something. I promise it won't be soup."

A corner of his mouth hooked up even father and he nodded. "Okay. As long as it's not soup."

She opened the refrigerator and saw containers with what she presumed were leftovers from supper. "Looks like there's leftovers from tonight, or there's some slices of roast beef left. I could make us some sandwiches."

"The sandwiches are fine," he said, leaning against the counter. "Need any help?"

Shaking her head she waved him towards the table. "These I can actually make. I made quite a few sandwiches at Kelly's. Do you want some fruit or anything?"

Jason stood and went to a cupboard, opening the door. "Francis has a stash of potato chips. Sandwiches need chips, not fruit."

She laughed at his logic, but said nothing as she continued to assemble their dinner. It was amazing at how at ease she felt again with the silence between them. Just over twelve hours ago she bolted from the room at the mere sight of him, and now she felt calmed by the knowledge of his presence. Maybe it wouldn't always be like this, but she was glad for it now.

Yvette sat at the table sipping her juice and picking at her breakfast. It wasn't surprising that Elizabeth wasn't here. But it was odd that Jason and Francis weren't there either. Jason as usually up at the crack of dawn, grabbing breakfast before disappearing into the garage for the rest of the day. She doubted he'd already left, so she was curious where he was. And Francis for that matter.

When the door opened and Francis walked in, she at least got one of her questioned answered. "Morning," he said."

"Good morning," she returned. "Everything okay?"

"Fine," he waived his hand as he grabbed a mug and filled it with coffee. "Just had an early meeting down at the guard hut. They were a little uncertain of something that happened last night."

"I thought you said everything was fine," she said, her forehead creased with worry.

"It is," he assured her, grabbing a plate before he sat down. "One of the guards saw lights on in the garage while he was out on patrol and when he went to investigate he saw Jason and Elizabeth through the window. He left since Jason was the boss."

She sat up and her left hand clenched tightly around her glass before she told herself to relax. "Elizabeth and Jason were down at the garage last night?"

"Apparently," he shrugged. "Guards didn't know if they should call since it was the middle of the night. They're just trying to make sure they do everything right."

"Did they have a fight?" she asked, worried about what may have happened between them and anxious with Francis who wasn't getting to the important stuff.

"No," he shook his head. "I heard them when they came in. I heard the door close downstairs and wondered who was up. I came downstairs and saw them sitting here in the kitchen eating. They were talking, they were comfortable...I went back upstairs. I figured whatever happened they didn't need me spying on them or stumbling into their time together. I figured we'd find out soon enough, I wasn't gonna be nosy. A little later I heard them come upstairs and their voices were soft, yet very cordial."

Leaning back in her seat she shook her head. "Well, that's good news. I just don't understand why they'd be down at the garage."

"You'd have to ask them," he chuckled. "I have given up trying to figure out rhyme or reason to those two. I figure it's gotta be good they talked and that's what I'm going to focus on."

"You're right," she smiled. "I'll stop with the doom and gloom. We'll just take our cues from them. In the meantime, Jason's got another doctor's appointment soon, right?"

"Yeah, Doc's got us an appointment off the books. He's gonna do x-rays and see if the cast can come off or if he should wait a couple of weeks."

"You know which one Jason would vote for," she chuckled. He was a recalcitrant patient and at times she was surprised he hadn't tried to rip his cast off.

"I'd vote for what?" he asked, coming into the kitchen and startling her. She still hadn't gotten used to how quiet he moved through the house.

"If you get your cast off next week or later," she smiled.

"Next week," he said firmly. "I am ready for this thing to be off. It itches."

She and Francis couldn't help but laugh at his sour face. "Just remember you've also got rehab, and it's not going to be easy."

"Just so long as I have this thing off and can get back to normal."

He grabbed a mug and filled it with coffee before coming over to the table. Normally Yvette tried to get him to eat some kind of breakfast, telling him that it was important part of him getting better. If he got the cast off she wouldn't really be able to say that anymore. Since she wasn't supposed to know that he'd eaten earlier this morning, she needed to at least make some sort of comment.

"You gotta have something more than coffee, Jason," she said with a light hearted grin.

"I'm not hungry," he answered with his usual reply.

"I am famished," Elizabeth announced as she walked into the kitchen. "For a big, hearty breakfast."

She began opening cupboards and looking around. "Something like pancakes or waffles. Oooh," she squealed in excitement, "we have Belgian waffle mix."

Pulling out the package and a bowl she turned around and gave a brilliant smile to the entire room. "Good morning, everyone."

"Morning," Francis grinned back at her.

Yvette arched a brow curiously, but answered, "Good morning, Elizabeth."

"Hey," Jason smiled back softly.

"Who wants waffles?"

"I'll take some," Francis answered immediately, already pulling out the waffle maker and turning it on.

"None for me, thanks," Yvette shook her head. She was full from eating earlier.

Elizabeth paused, fixing a look on Jason as her hip cocked out to the side. "Jason?" she drawled.

He peered up from over his coffee cup. "Yes?"

"Do you want a waffle or not?"

"I don't eat breakfast," he said. His voice was disinterested, but Yvette could see he was fighting a smirk.

"You are still recovering," she said, challenging him to disagree with the arch of her brow. "It's either a waffle or soup."

Jason flinched even as she smirked. Yvette could see there was clearly something about soup that they liked to tease each other about and she was curious, but most of all she just marveled at the sudden ease they had. Yesterday she would have thought a scene like this was impossible. She looked over at Francis and could see the guard was just as amused by the exchange.

"I'll take a waffle," Jason said slowly, with little reluctance.

Elizabeth beamed triumphantly and set about measuring out the mix. "Eggs?" she asked him.

Jason shook his head. "Sausage."

Yvette could only shake her head at the scene. Whatever had happened last night between the two of them in the garage was definitely a positive thing, and while she didn't fully understand it, she smiled in approval.

Chapter 37

"You sure about this?"

Jason looked over at her and gave her a little smile as he nodded. "Come on."

"Jason," she paused, nibbling on her lip, "you only got your cast off a week ago. Are you sure you should be riding a motorcycle, let alone be handling extra weight?"

He looked at her with a little smirk, walking towards her until one more step and he would be touching her chest to thigh. She felt so small standing next to him in just her sneakers, and she craned hr neck back so she could see him. "Elizabeth, get on the bike."

"You sure your arm is strong enough? I don't want you getting hurt."

"I've been doing my exercises. We won't stay out too long. I just need to be on it, to ride, and I think you could use that too. Unless you'd really rather go back to the house?"

She couldn't really deny his argument, she did want to go for a ride, she just didn't want him to get hurt. Looking over his shoulder at the ceiling, she sighed and decided to stop worrying so much. She smiled and looked back into his eyes, "Okay."

"Good," he grinned, and reached behind him to grab a helmet. "Here."

A few minutes later they were on the road outside the gates. The last time, the only other time she rode with Jason, she hadn't paid much attention to the countryside. Elizabeth had been trying to just savor the feeling of the ride. She'd had her eyes closed, trying to stem the tears and focused on the wind as it slid over her skin and rushed past her ears. More focused then on trying to keep from telling Jason she was in love with him, she hadn't noticed where they were riding.

Now she was amazed at the beauty of the area. The lush foliage, the multitude of colors, it all was so amazing. They weren't going as fast as they had in times past, and they weren't leaning steeply into the turns, but she loved being on the bike with Jason. She knew he was still weak, and wasn't pushing like he might have if he was by himself. She liked that they were going a little slower because it meant, among other things, that they got to spend more time together.

Reaching the outskirts of a town, Jason slowed the bike and Elizabeth sat up straighter, still holding onto him. The bustling of the streets, especially as they neared the marketplace was intriguing. She'd always been in the controlled environment of the house and the property; it was a little scary and thrilling to be around so many people. Jason looked back at her as he asked, "Want to stop?"

"Yeah," she said before she could think about it too long and talk herself out of it.

He found a place to stop and parked the bike. Pulling off her helmet she handed it to Jason before turning and running her hands through her hair while she looked around. She was so caught up in looking that when Jason touched her elbow, she was startled, arms jerking and stepped back from him, a move he matched.

"Sorry," he said immediately, jamming his hands in his pockets.

"No, no," she shook her head, feeling bad for the change of mood that had settled over them. "I was just caught up in watching everything."

She hated these moments. Times when they would suddenly freeze, choke on tension and unease with each other. He would pull back, afraid he had done something to offend or upset her, and she would be unable to explain why exactly she'd frozen. Unable to explain or even reassure him, they would falter, fumble blindly to get back to a better, more sure place.

"So, where are we?" she asked, her voice forced as she tried to infuse enthusiasm into it. If they were back at the house they would be able to retreat, even if it was to opposite sides of a room, or the yard, spend time alone, yet together, until they gradually reached out. Here, they didn't have that luxury, and she refused to go home just because of a minor setback.

"Zarcero," he said softly, his voice rough with unspoken emotion. "Come on. I think you'll like this."

They walked along in silence, Jason a couple of feet away from her instead of at her side. He didn't walk too fast, instead matching his pace to hers as they went. He was definitely leading them though, pointing silently where they needed to turn until they walked through the arches of a park and she stopped.

Animals and other figures had been shaped from the bushes, and the park was full of them. Other people, many looking like tourists, were walking around, pointing in amazement and snapping pictures. She turned and looked up at Jason who was watching her cautiously. "Jason, this is amazing. What is this place?"

"It's called Central Park," he said, his shoulders losing some of their tension as she enthused about the place. "The man who shapes the bushes has been doing it for over thirty years."

"Thirty years?" she marveled. "Wow. Come on, let's look at them."

Elizabeth linked her arm through his, and enthusiastically pulled him along so she could see all the creations. As they walked, Jason told her about the park, as well as the town and the surrounding area. When he mentioned the town of Sarchi, she looked at him, the name stirring some memory in her.

"Is it far from here?"

He shook his head. "It's too the south, not very far. There's also Grecia, which has a huge church made all from metal. Guillermo, one of the guards, was born there and he was telling me about it. He said the area gets a lot of lightening, and they also grow pineapples around there."

She smiled; definitely knowing they would have to go there some day. Slowly, she slid her hand down to Jason's, and clasped them together. He dropped his gaze, and then squeezed gently. "What else is around here?" she asked.

"Well," he said, guiding them slowly to the next shaped bush, "there's a volcano. Arenal, which is said to be the most active volcano on earth."

"Even more than the ones in Hawaii?"

He shrugged. "That's what they say. There are also hot springs, and a lake. There are some jungles over towards the Atlantic side with another volcano and some lodges where you can stay right in the rainforest."

"You've been doing a lot of reading, haven't you?" she asked with a smile as he ticked off all the different sights of the area. "Have you worn out your book yet?"

"Not yet," he shook his head with a grin at her teasing.

"I'm sorry you haven't gotten to explore the area yet."

He stopped and turned to face her, shaking his head. "I don't mind. Besides, now we can explore the places together, if we want."

"I'd like that," she said, her voice suddenly sounding breathy with excitement. "Know what else I'd like?"

Jason shook his head. "Uh-uh."

"Lunch."

Laughing, he squeezed her hand. "Come on. Let's go find something to eat."

Jason put the bike into the garage, happy despite the soreness in his shoulder and arm. He rolled his arm and grimaced as the muscles twinged in protest. He hated the slow process of healing.

"You didn't over do it, did you?" Elizabeth asked as she stepped inside the garage.

"I don't think so," he shook his head. "It's probably just reacting to doing something I haven't done in a while."

"Alright," she accept, "I just don't want you to hurt yourself."

"You just don't want Yvette to tell me we can't go back out on the motorcycle again," he chuckled as they walked out of the garage.

"Well there is that," she said, nudging him with her shoulder, "but that isn't the only reason."

"I know," he answered softly. He didn't want the moment to get too tense and for her to get uncomfortable again. He was glad that despite the awkward moments they had, they were getting more comfortable being around each other.

They slowly walked back towards the house, prolonging their time together and slipped into an easy silence. As the trees thinned and they reached the edge of the lawn, Elizabeth paused. Jason stopped as well, glancing across the yard towards the house, then back to her. "Elizabeth, are you okay?"

She nodded, but her eyes were clouded and troubled. "I've been doing a lot of thinking lately."

"About what?" he asked, curious as to what could be the cause of her sudden glum look.

"About Port Charles," she said, stepping forward and heading for the lawn swing Yvette had asked for. Sitting down she gestured for him to sit beside her. "I...there is a part of me that feels I should have to go back and face what happened with Ric. I know I can't do that, because if we could argue my case based on my PTSD, Scott Baldwin would throw the book at you for breaking me out of the hospital and taking me out of the country. I won't do anything that puts your freedom in jeopardy."

"Elizabeth," he said softly, "if you feel you need to go back, we'll go back."

He knew Baldwin would come after him, but that was a risk he was willing to take. But Elizabeth shook her head adamantly. "No."

"Elizabeth-"

"No," she cut him off. "I won't see you got to prison. I can't let you go. And I can't leave you behind and go back by myself. They'd watch me, trying to follow me back to you. I'd have to stay away forever, or at least years. Easing my conscience isn't that important to me that I'd risk losing you."

"It won't happen," he said, placing his hand tentatively over hers. "It won't happen."

She smiled back at him tremulously. "So, after I stopped working myself up into a frenzy over that, I started wondering how everyone was doing. Have you kept in contact with Emily?"

"Not very much," he admitted. "It's hard to have contact with her and she understands that. I could have called her, but I didn't really want to."

Puzzled, she peered at him. "Why not?"

"Because I didn't want to have to lie to her, and I didn't want to tell her I was hurt, or how it happened."

"I'm sorry, Jason."

He shook his head. "Don't be. It's just not something I wanted to tell her until I was better, and so were you. Do…do you want to call her?"

"Is it okay?" she asked immediately. "I mean, they're not watching her or listening to her phones are they?"

"When Sonny was here I asked him how the investigation was going. We have a guy on the inside and he told Sonny they don't have any leads on where we went." He didn't feel uncomfortable telling her that. Even if they could go back to Port Charles she would never say anything. "They're frustrated, but they've pretty much given up on finding us. They watched the others for a while, but they don't' have the manpower to keep tailing people on a cold case."

Her eyes were brightening and she smiled. "So we can call her?"

"Yeah, we can call her."

She leaned forward and hugged him tightly. "Thank you, Jason."

He brought his arms up slowly, hugging her back as he closed his eyes. These moments when she touched him, when she didn't shy or skitter away from him, they made up for every bad moment that came before. Turning his face into her hair, he let himself relish the moment. "You're welcome, Elizabeth."

Chapter 38

Elizabeth walked up the stairs, the laughter of Yvette and Francis floating up behind her as they found something amusing. She wondered if some day soon Yvette would go back to her practice in Puerto Rico. She knew it wouldn't be right away, there were things they were still dealing with, things Elizabeth knew they hadn't full delved into, but she knew her doctor couldn't stay here forever. Gail had told her, as well as Yvette, that the goal was to get Elizabeth to the point where she could distinguish reality from the past stressors and cope with them. There may be times when Elizabeth might need to talk, but the daily sessions wouldn't always be needed.

As she reached the second floor she heard laughter from Jason carrying out of the library. She smiled, being warmed by the sound. It wasn't a common occurrence, and she was glad Jason had a relationship with Emily that he was comfortable enough to let his guard down and laugh. It made her wish she had that with her family, but it also made her miss Emily even more.

She stepped quietly into the room, and when he looked up and smiled at her, she held her finger up to her lips. "Do you want more time?" she asked softly.

He shook his head and motioned her into the room. "Emily, listen, Elizabeth is here."

"Don't end because of me," she said.

"It's okay," he assured her quietly. "Yes, Emily. I will call you again, sooner this time. I promise. Okay...you too, Emily. Bye."

Handing the phone to her, he smiled and squeezed her hand, one of the few times he had initiated contact with her. Then he said, "I'll let you talk."

"Thank you, Jason," she whispered and watched him walk from the room.

"Elizabeth?"

Emily's soft voice carried through the phone and Elizabeth shook her head as she looked down at it, cradled in her hand. "Hey, Em. How are you?"

"Doing really good now that I've heard yours and Jason's voices. Jason didn't say much, but he said you were getting better." There was a hopeful note in Emily's voice, as well as a question.

"Yeah," she nodded, even though her friend couldn't see. "My doctor has been really good, and I'm finally getting a handle on what happened. I haven't had an episode in a while."

"That is so wonderful," Emily said, her voice thick with emotions and tears. "I knew you would get better...I knew it."

"Thank you," she whispered. "I've really missed you, Em. So tell me what's going on back home."

She knew Emily was curious, and probably had a lot of questions, but sometimes Elizabeth just didn't want to talk. It had been a while since she'd spoken with Emily, and the last time had ended abruptly when her friend had mentioned Courtney was leaving and Jason had broken up with the other woman. Elizabeth knew Emily could talk for hours about things back in Port Charles, and she needed a little of time to adjust before she could get into the deeper stuff with her friend.

Elizabeth heard about Nikolas and Gia and how their wedding plans kept stalling, and she heard about Lucky who seemed to be running around after Luke trying to keep him out of trouble. Emily told her about Bobbie and the others at Kelly's and she spent a good portion of the time filling her in on everything happening in the Quartermaine household. By the time Emily was done, Elizabeth had learned about Lila's garden plans for the summer and Edward's latest fight with Cook over the latter's attempt to substitute vegetable sausage patties in the former's breakfast to help lower his cholesterol.

After having exhausted all other topics she then talked about Zander's job with Ned, and how her own therapy was going. Elizabeth felt like she was in the room with her friend, and all that was missing was some form of chocolate beverage. Finally, Emily's chatter slowed and she cautiously asked if Elizabeth was still there or if she'd fallen asleep from boredom.

"I'm here," Elizabeth laughed. "I just loved listening to you."

"I do kinda ramble, don't I?"

"I love it," Elizabeth stressed. "I've missed listening to you, and I've missed everyone back home."

"I missed you too, Elizabeth. Listen," she said cautiously, "you don't have to answer if you don't want to, but you killed Ric, didn't you?"

Elizabeth took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Yeah, I did."

She went on to explain how she had heard him in the park and realized he'd taken advantage of someone. She didn't feel it was her place to mention Carly's name, whether Jason's friend told people was her business, not Elizabeth's; but Emily was smart enough to piece it together and promised she wouldn't say anything to anyone. Not even Zander. Elizabeth explained how Ric had stopped by her studio, and how she remembered her own attack and wanted Ric to leave, but he didn't want her to tell Jason or Sonny. When she fell silent she could Emily's soft sniffles coming through the phone.

"I'm so sorry, Elizabeth," her friend said through her tears. "I...I can't even imagine what that was like for you."

"It wasn't easy remembering it, or dealing with it," Elizabeth agreed, wiping at her eyes. "I broke Jason's arm when I was remembering that night and in my mind I thought he was Ric."

"He doesn't blame you," Emily quickly said. "And neither do I. You couldn't control it, Elizabeth, and you didn't do it deliberately."

"Thank you, Emily," she said, wiping at the last of her tears. "It was almost harder to deal with hurting Jason than it was to deal with the memories of Ric. Because Jason is the last person I ever wanted to hurt."

"He knows that. I know that," her friend assured her. "So...are things...Jason wasn't really talkative."

"Really?" Elizabeth interrupted teasingly. "He's not talkative?"

"Funny, Elizabeth," Emily laughed. "He's also reluctant to answer certain questions. So..."

"You want to ask me."

"Well, I was trying to transition into it, but it's hard to do that on a phone," she laughed again, a little indignantly this time. "So forget polite. What's going on with you and Jason? Do you still think this just pity, or do you believe it's more?"

Elizabeth could only shake her head and laugh. Emily was much better when she just went for the direct route. "I don't think it's pity anymore. And to answer your question and ease your incredibly curious mind, things are much better between Jason and me."

Emily was startled when she heard the knock on her door. She wiped her face and hoped whoever was there wouldn't question her about her tearstains. Maybe it was just Alice bringing up laundry or something. Opening the door she was surprised to see Zander standing there. "Zander?"

He frowned, his hands coming up to frame her face. Rubbing at the slight wetness under her eyes he asked, "What's wrong? Are you hurt?"

"I'm fine," she shook her head. "What are you doing here? I thought you had a meeting with Ned."

"It ended early, so he called it a day, said I could go." Sliding his hands down her arms he peered at her, "What's going on?"

Giving a quick glance into the hall to make sure no one else was around; she pulled him into her bedroom and closed the door. "I talked to Jason and Elizabeth today."

"What?" he asked, clearly surprised and intrigued. "It's been months since you heard from them."

She sat down on her bed, running her hands over the cover. "I know. The other day I was in Kelly's after my therapy and Sonny came in to pick up some coffee. He said hello, sat down to talk, and then when no one was around said Jason and Elizabeth wanted to call me, what time was good?"

"How's she doing?" he asked as he sat down beside her.

Emily's smile was bright as she answered, "So much better. She...she remembered what happened with Ric and her doctor's helping her deal with it all. She hasn't had an episode for a while."

Zander's shoulders drooped in relief. "That's great news. I knew if she could just get to a safe place she could get better."

"Jason really came through for her," she nodded.

Sighing, Zander sat up and rubbed the back of his neck. "I know your brother and I haven't always gotten along, and I doubt we'll ever really be friends, but I knew he would do anything to help her."

"He's in love with her."

His eyebrows rose in question. "Did he actually say that?"

"No," she shook her head, "but he is. Just like Elizabeth is in love with him. They never got over each other, despite trying to. He never gave Courtney a second thought, really, when Elizabeth was in trouble. He did everything he could to help her and it killed him when she shut him out."

"I know," Zander admitted. "I could see it when he was here, though he was trying not to show it."

"Elizabeth didn't think she was worthy of being love, especially by Jason, so she fought it. She freaked last time when I told her Jason had broken up with Courtney before Elizabeth got sick."

"So they're together now?" her boyfriend questioned.

"Kinda," she hedged. "Elizabeth has dealt with a lot of stuff with her doctor, and part of that has been her relationship with Jason. They've talked and they admitted they care about each other, they're both just scared to say the words out loud right now. But they're not avoiding each other, they're spending time together, and things are getting better between them."

"So I take it you're kinda happy about that," he observed with a small grin.

She nodded. "I am. Really. I want them to be happy. And they seem to be happiest when they're together."

"I don't really understand it, and it really used to bug me, but you're right."

Emily smiled and stood, walking over to her mirror and checking her reflection. She wiped the mascara smudges off, and didn't care about the rest. Walking over to Zander, she pulled him to his feet; made sure the extra cell phone was put away, then gave him a kiss. "Come on. You drive, and I'll call Lucky to have him meet us at Nikolas and Gia's. They deserve to hear this update too."

Chapter 39

Elizabeth was sitting in the library when Jason walked past, paused and then turned into the room. "Hey," he questioned, "you okay?"

She looked up and smiled fleetingly at him. "Yeah. I mean I knew this day would come and I knew I would be sad..."

He put his arm around her shoulder as he sat down on the window seat beside her. "I'm sorry, Elizabeth."

She shook her head, then leaned it on his shoulder. "It's not your fault. She has a practice, and other people who need her. She can't stay here forever just because I'll miss her. She's done her job here."

A month after their first ride into Zarcero, Yvette told them that she felt it was time to go back to Puerto Rico. Elizabeth had made great progress dealing with the traumatic events that befell her and rebuilding her life. She would be available if Elizabeth suffered a setback, but she didn't need Yvette's daily presence in her life. It used to be a day that Elizabeth had looking forward to, being told she was better and her doctor was heading back to her own life. At the same she'd dreaded this day because when she got better she thought Jason would leave. She used to be of two minds regarding that departure; now that she was secure in Jason's feelings for her and knew he wouldn't be leaving, she was struck with how much she was going to miss Yvette. The woman wasn't just her doctor; she had become a friend.

But she knew there was no reason for Yvette to stay, other than to be her companion, and she was too brilliant of a doctor to stay here forever. Elizabeth would have to learn how to live without her. It had taken just over a week for all the arrangements to be made, and Elizabeth and Jason offered to go with her to the airport, but she merely shook her head and said she'd rather Francis take her. Maybe she didn't want to cry any more than she already had, or maybe she just wanted more time with Francis. It was a quasi-relationship, more than friendship, they'd seem to form, but each one had said that they knew with her imminent departure someday they'd held it to just friends. Bunk, if they'd wanted Elizabeth's opinion.

"I know she'll miss you too. And I'll miss her as well." Jason's fingers trailed lightly over her arm in comfort and she smiled at the feeling. "Do you want to be alone?"

She shook her head. "No. Otherwise I'll just sit here and wallow and I don't want to do that. We said goodbye, she's on her way to the airport with Francis, no point in sitting here crying."

"It's okay to feel sad. She was a big part of your life."

"I know," she said, turning to smile at him. "I was just having a moment there. I knew this day was coming, I don't think I would have been prepared for it no matter when it came."

She stood and shifted gears. "So, what are you up to for today?"

He stood up and smiled at her. "Yes."

"What?"

"You want to go for a bike ride," he chuckled, "and you were trying to figure out how to ask. I'm just saving you the trouble and saying yes."

She crossed her arms over her chest and glared at him. "I wasn't fishing for a ride. I mean sure...maybe I was hoping that later today…or even tomorrow we could go for a ride. I merely asked what you were doing today."

"So you don't want to go for a ride?" he asked teasingly.

"Oh, I give up," she sighed, flinging her hands out. "Yes, I want to go for a ride."

"I knew you'd see it my way. Come on," he said, gesturing towards the door.

"Where are we going?" she asked with a smile even as she walked beside him.

"Don't you trust me?"

She did, and even though he asked her in jest, she wanted him to know she trusted him in all ways. "Of course I trust you, Jason. You asked me that once before, and you took me and bought me a baseball bat so I wouldn't feel afraid."

"I remember," he said, his voice dropping slightly.

"I trusted you then, and I trust you now. On more than just going somewhere with you. I forgot, got confused for a little while...but I trust you with everything inside me. I once said my faith in you was unshakeable and justifiable. I still feel that way."

His eyes were slightly moist as Jason reached for her hand. She watched his Adam's apple bob as he swallowed once, then twice before speaking. "I...it amazes me you would feel this way. I will try very hard never to hurt you."

"Don't worry if you do," she shook her head gently. "'Cause I'll probably hurt you without meaning to."

He tugged on her wrist, pulling her into his arm and wrapping them around her. Sometimes he hesitated with her still, but she was happy he felt more comfortable around her that he would take her hand or hug her. It helped her feel more confident in reaching out to him. She smiled, resting her cheek against his chest and loving the feel she had when she was in his arms.

"We'll be okay, because I'm not giving up on you, Jason," she said, looking up at him.

"I'm not giving up on you either, Elizabeth. I'm not giving up on us."

She swallowed nervously, licking her dry lips and did what she did best when she was nervous with the emotions she felt towards him, she babbled. "So...what was that about a ride?"

"One track mind," he shook his head and smiled. Then, holding her hand, he led her from the room.

Jason pulled up in front of the shop and turned off the engine, then reached around to help Elizabeth off the bike. She took off her helmet and handed it to him and then looked around. "How come we stopped here?"

"I wanted to show you something," he said, pulling a key from his pocket.

She watched curiously as he unlocked the door and reached in to flip on the lights. "What are you up to, Jason?"

"I'm thinking of buying this," he said as they stepped inside. The three small service bays were a bit outdated, but he and Francis could fix them up. They were even thinking of having Guillermo help, the young guard having shown a proficiency with tools and helping Jason repair his bikes. "Well, actually, Francis and I are thinking of buying it."

"You want to run a garage again?" she asked a bit unsure, looking around. "I mean, are you sure? I-I remember you ran a garage before Lucky died, but you eventually went back to the business."

"I like working on bikes," he said, "and I don't mind working on cars. Francis is even thinking we could rent bikes to tourists or something."

"Do you thinking you could be happy doing that?" she pressed. "I know what it meant to you to work for Sonny. I know you couldn't go back to the States, but you could still do things for him. I wouldn't mind."

"Elizabeth," he said, holding out his hand to her and waiting for her to take it. "I'm not going to back to work for Sonny. People wouldn't like it if I never came back to Port Charles but was working for him. I'm out. And I like it that way."

"You're sure?" she asked again. "I know you weren't working for him while I was getting better, but I am now."

"And I still don't want to go back," he assured her. "I want to do something, even though I don't need the money."

"I know," she nodded. "You aren't really a person who enjoys sitting around doing nothing."

"Will you be okay if I do this?" He didn't want her to feel abandoned and left alone in the house all day.

"Well, it is an awfully big house for just one person," she mused and he found himself holding his breath. "So, I guess that just means I'll have to find something to do with myself."

"We could use a secretary," he joked with a smile. He wasn't going to tell her yet, since she hadn't mentioned her art since the day shortly after they arrived and said she didn't feel like painting anymore, but there was a building out back that could be converted into a studio. He'd wait to see if she ever brought up wanting to paint or sketch again. If not...it wasn't like they needed the space for the garage.

"A secretary?" she tipped her head. "I flunked typing in high school because I spent the entire time watching Lucky. And I'm not really good with numbers. I know for a fact that you're much better with the books than I could ever be. So I don't really think I could help you out."

"Okay," he shrugged. "You'll find something you want to do."

"I'm sure I will," she smiled with a nod. "I might have an idea or two, or maybe I'll just have you teach me how to repair bikes and then I can be the mechanic and Francis can be the secretary."

Jason laughed and she joined in, adding, "I wouldn't have to worry about you scoping out his legs."

"You wouldn't have to worry about that anyway," he told her, "unless you took the job. The only person's legs I'm interested in checking out are yours."

She blushed slightly and looked down, digging the toe of her shoe into the ground. He loved having the freedom to tease her, knowing she wouldn't think he was anything but sincere. He didn't push her, didn't want to make her feel uncomfortable by increasing the sexual tension too much. He hadn't even kissed her yet because he refused to make her feel he was pressuring her for more than she was ready to deal with.

"So, you like it?" he asked. "You okay with me working here?"

She nodded and smiled. "Yeah. I think it's great, Jason."

"Then I'll let Francis know and we can get started on the paperwork." He led them towards the door and flipped off the lights. "Now that we've taken care of this, what would you like to do for the rest of the day? Do you want to stay here in the village or do you want to go somewhere else?"

"I'm cool with staying closer to home today. And I'm kinda hungry."

For someone so tiny Elizabeth sure did enjoy eating...enthusiastically. She loved sampling the local cuisine. They had found a little diner, run by a sweet grandmother whose recipes had been in the family for generations. After locking the door they slowly walked towards the place that had become a fast favorite of theirs in only a matter of weeks.

As they sat eating the fried plantains and cabbage salad served before their main dish, Elizabeth surprised him by asking, "Do you think Sonny will ever come back to visit?"

"I don't know," he said, wiping the corner of his mouth. "Maybe. It's hard for him to get away, plus he doesn't want to lie to Carly when it's not really business."

"You miss her, don't you?"

"Even though sometimes she frustrates me and I just want to throw my hands up in the air and be done with her, yeah," he smiled wryly, "I miss her. Why?"

"Well, I was just thinking," she started out tentatively. "I know we might not be able to do it right away because even if you think the police aren't watching them, it still could be tricky-"

He reached across the table and took her hand, stilling her nervous chattering. "Elizabeth? You're not making sense."

"Some day I want to see Emily and the others again. Maybe it's not possible," she shrugged, struggling to keep things light but he could see the importance this was to her, "and if it's not I'll accept it. But I'd really hate to go the rest of my life never being able to see anyone from our past ever again."

She looked down at their hands, and then covered his with her free hand, sandwiching it between her petite ones. As she spoke she slowly lifted her gaze. "I also thought that if I'm feeling that way, then you might be too about Sonny and Carly. I know how much you care about them, plus…Sonny was a really big help when he was down here, even though I resented him and fought him. I'd like to tell him thank you."

Her eyes misted over and she pressed her lips together. "I also...I just want to know how Carly's doing as well, because I know how frightening it can be."

Raising his free hand, Jason reached out and brushed away the tears that had spilled onto Elizabeth's cheek. "We may not be able to do it right away, and they could probably never come to Costa Rica, but we might be able to see the people back home."

She smiled and grabbed her napkin, wiping her eyes. "I guess as long as I have the thought of some day, I don't care if takes a while. I never thought I'd be in a place like this with you. That we could get past everything between us, but we have. After that, I believe that anything is possible, even if it takes a little time."

He shifted his hand that was on top of hers so that their palms were together, her hand cradled in his. Lifting their hands he leaned forward and brushed a kiss over her knuckles, pressing them against his cheek. After watching her shatter, and then slowly repair herself, he knew she was strong. Together he knew they could face anything, get through anything that came at them. Because they had finally stopped hiding from themselves and each other. He would spend the rest of his life making her dreams come true, and maybe in the process a few of his own as well.

Epilogue

She loved the briny smell of the ocean. For as much as she loved her home in the jungle and didn't want to move to one of the coasts, she did sometimes miss the smell of the salt in the water. But she was now finding herself homesick for the smell of the damp earth and thick vegetation as she sat on the beach and listened to the waves crash ashore.

"Elizabeth?"

She looked up, bringing her hand to shield against the setting sun and squinted at the person who'd called her name. "Hey, Carly."

"Do-do you mind if I join you?"

"Since when have you ever cared about what I felt?" she said without malice and a wisp of a smile.

Sitting down on the ground beside her, Carly brushed her hair back over her shoulder. After three days on the same island, Elizabeth had become more relaxed, less guarded around Carly. Once she was situated, Carly turned and softly cleared her throat. "I wondered if we could talk? Just us...without Jason or Sonny around."

"Sure," Elizabeth agreed, turning slightly to face the blonde whose tone concerned her. "What's going on?"

"I wanted to say thank you." When Elizabeth remained silent she went on. "First, thank you for telling Jason and Sonny about Dr. Baldwin. After...after I told Sonny what happened I thought that was all I needed to do. Just tell him and I would be fine."

"But you weren't," Elizabeth said when Carly fell silent.

She shook her head and dashed at her eyes. "No, I wasn't. And Sonny helped me to see that, and so did Dr. Baldwin. She's really great."

"She is," Elizabeth agreed softly. "She helped me after my rape, and she was trying to help me with my PTSD...I knew she'd be able to help you. She has a patience and a manner that can help calm the most frightened person. I knew she'd be right for you."

"I also wanted to thank you for believing me." Carly was looking down at the sand, her fingers nervously splaying through it.

Elizabeth looked over at her confused. "Believing you?"

"About Ric. You never even asked me, you didn't even doubt. You did what I was afraid others wouldn't. I figured they'd remember how I was when I came to town and what I'd done to Bobbie and A.J. and they'd believe his side; that I came onto him because I was mad at Sonny." She paused and looked out over the water, the shadows of the sun emphasizing the deep lines of pain and frustration on her face. "I slept with Sonny because I saw Jason dancing with you, why wouldn't I get drunk and sleep with Ric after I saw Sonny kissing Brenda?"

Elizabeth wasn't going to walk into the minefield of Carly's last question. Instead she took a deep breath, and shivered despite the heat of the day and the sand, and focused on Carly's other comments. "I believed you because the look on your face...it was real. It was like being fifteen again and looking into a mirror. You weren't angry and plotting, you were scared, you were vulnerable and raw...I knew you were telling the truth."

"You were fifteen?" Carly asked quietly with awe, and Elizabeth could only nod.

Both women fell silent, each with their own thoughts, their own ghosts and demons. The sun sank slowly into the water and the air chilled, raising goose bumps on Elizabeth's flesh. "Do you...do you regret what you did?" Carly asked quietly.

"Sometimes," Elizabeth admitted. "I killed someone. It doesn't matter if it was self-defense, or if other times I think Ric deserved it, I killed a person. I've come to accept it, and I've come to understand it, but it will always be with me."

"I'm sorry, Elizabeth," the blonde said. "I'm sorry that you had to do go through that. If I...if I'd told Jason or Sonny they would have dealt with him. You would never have had to be alone with him."

"It's not your fault, Carly," Elizabeth shook her head. "It's not Sonny or Jason's fault for not realizing what happened to you. The blame lies solely on Ric."

"I know. Dr. Baldwin has helped me realize that. Did your doctor help you?" she asked with genuine concern.

"Yeah," she nodded. "Jason found me a wonderful doctor. He didn't have to do half the things he did, but I'm grateful."

"I resented you," Carly admitted and Elizabeth looked over at her. "For a long time I resented you. It started when you took care of him after he was shot, and then when he took you out of the country and left us all behind. But it was selfish of me, because he's happy. I look at him and he looks calm, and like he doesn't want to be anywhere else. You do that for him."

"He'll always be your friend, Carly. That won't ever change."

"I know it won't," Carly said assuredly, as she stood and brushed the sand off her. "I've finally realized he can love someone else and that I won't lose my friend."

She started walking back towards the cabins and paused, "Are you coming?"

"In a little bit. You go on ahead."

Elizabeth didn't know how long she sat there after Carly left; the last of the sunlight gave way to stars and a cool January breeze came in off the ocean. Carly had said it so easily that Jason was in love with her that it surprised her. Elizabeth didn't doubt that Jason loved her, even though he hadn't said the words. She hadn't said the words either and she wondered why she continued to hold back. She loved Jason, had for a long time, and he deserved to hear the words from her. While they had made great strides in their relationship it was time to get unstuck from second gear and truly move forward.

He sensed her before her saw her. Elizabeth quietly joined him in the shade, and hiding place, of the small grove near the beach and sat down beside him. She didn't say anything as he watched Michael running back and forth between the water and his family. Sometimes the little boy would pause for a moment under the big umbrella and say something to Carly or Sonny, or show an object to his baby brother.

When Sonny had called three months ago and said Carly had given birth Jason was happy for them. While Sonny loved Michael dearly, just as Jason had, Jason knew what having a child of his own flesh and blood meant to Sonny. Then his friend told him the baby's name, Morgan Stone Corinthos, and Jason felt a little honored, and a little embarrassed. Sonny said Jason and Stone were his greatest friends and he wanted his children to know about them. While he thought Morgan should have his own name, Jason also remembered that he had named Michael because Emily said he should choose a name that was special, that meant something to him, and he'd chosen to give the little boy Sonny's name.

When Jason and Elizabeth had arrived on the island several nights ago, Michael was already asleep, worn out by the sun and the fun. Morgan was awake though, more thrown by the change of routine than his brother, and Carly placed him in Jason's arms and let him give the baby his bottle. He had suggested to his friends, even though it was hard, that they not tell Michael he and Elizabeth were there. To let the little boy continue to think their trip was just a post-Christmas vacation. He didn't want Michael to feel the pressure of having to keep it a secret that he'd seen Jason and Elizabeth. While the little boy acted grown up, he was still a child, and they just couldn't risk him accidentally saying something to the wrong person. Maybe in a year or two he'd be able to see the boy he once raised and swim in the ocean with him and teach him to surf.

In the meantime, he got to see Sonny and Carly, and spend secluded time with Elizabeth. He reached over and plucked Elizabeth's hand up off the ground and clasp it in his. Sliding closer to her he wrapped his other arm around her waist, brushing a kiss across her cheek when she turned to look at him. "Thank you for finding me," he said softly, "I didn't want to be alone anymore."

She smiled and nodded, turning her head more and brushing a chaste kiss across his lips. "When you set out this morning I could tell you wanted to be by yourself, but it's been a couple of hours and I...I just wanted to check on you."

"I'm glad you did."

"Is it hard?" she asked. "Seeing him and not being able to talk to him?"

He looked back out towards the beach and saw Michael run into the surf and duck his head under a wave. "Sometimes. But I just want him to be a kid, to play and have fun; not have to worry about keeping my secret."

"I know," she said, rubbing her free hand slowly in circles across his back. She'd never tried to change his mind like Carly and Sonny had, she merely supported him and helped him when it was hard to observe from a distance and not be able to interact with the little boy he loved. She leaned her head against his shoulder and peered up at him. "Do you want to stay here? Or would you maybe like to go for a walk?"

Sonny had now joined Michael in the water and Jason looked away, back to Elizabeth. "Yeah, a walk sounds nice."

They stood silently, and headed away from the beach, their fingers twined together. As they walked, Elizabeth quietly filled the air telling him about her encounter with Carly the night before. She'd arrived back at their rooms late, long after Carly had passed by on her way to dinner with Sonny and Michael, and when Jason expressed his relief to see her she said she was exhausted and emotionally drained and asked if she could tell him about it later. Then she'd gone into her room and slept, skipping dinner and not waking until morning as he was ready to leave. He listened as she softly recalled what happened and he was glad both women were able to find a measure of peace and closure for what had happened with Ric.

"She seems happier now," Elizabeth said. "More settled. I think Gail's helped her with more than just the rape."

"I agree," he nodded. There was a little more calmness surrounding Carly. She seemed happy as a mother and a wife, yet she hadn't lost the fire she had from the beginning. It was more like her desperateness, her need to claw out a space for herself, was gone.

"I was thinking about when we go back," she said, some time later as they'd continued to walk. "I think I know what I want to do."

He looked down at her, wondering what she had come up with after all these months of reading and thinking that she'd been doing. "What's that?"

"After being around the artists in Sarchi and the other towns, I want to start painting again. That cold emptiness I had when we first arrived in Costa Rica, it's gone. All the bright colors, the bold designs the artists use, I've been studying them, talking with several of them. I want to stop burying that part of me."

He squeezed her hand, smiling at the light that was back in her eyes. "I'm glad you found that happiness again. I...I didn't say it before, but there's a building behind the shop that we own. You could make it into a studio or a gallery if you want."

"Really?" she asked, turning and walking backwards as she looked up at him. He put his hand on her waist to guide her and keep her from tripping over anything.

"If you want."

"I'd like that," she smiled. "I'd like to have a studio at the house too. But I like being in town with you."

"I like having you there," he admitted.

"Good," she nodded, "then it's settled. I already talked to Sonny and he's going to have Emily get my paintings and sketchbooks together. I guess she and Zander packed up my studio and stored the stuff at Wyndamere."

"Been giving this a little thought, haven't you?" he chuckled.

She stopped and he followed suit. "I have," she confirmed. "You knew I needed to make this decision on my own and you never pushed, just said you'd support me no matter what. I finally realized that I couldn't let Ric keep making me afraid to paint. It's time to reclaim all aspects of the life that I want. And I'm a painter, I like doing it."

"I know," he smiled, watching the light grow brighter.

"I know I've said it before, Jason, but thank you. For everything you did, and everything you do. It's no wonder I love you as much as I do. You make it possible for me to be me."

She stepped forward and wrapped her arms around him tightly, burying her face in his chest. He bent down, pressing his cheek to her hair and blinking back the tears at her admission of love. While she showed it in the things she did and said to him, it was the first time she'd said the actual words and his heart filled with the love he had for her and that they'd found their way back together after a long road of struggles. Whatever happened after this, he would always remember this moment.

"I love you, too, Elizabeth," he whispered, pulling her even tighter.

The End

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